Please reload

Recent Posts

I'm busy working on my blog posts. Watch this space!

Please reload

Featured Posts

Am I selling out?

March 1, 2017

I started to write this just as I was transitioning out of about a dozen years of direct service work.  Emotions raw, I was elated at the prospects ahead of me and the freedom I felt in leaving behind the world of weekly on-call rotations, client mental health crises and unrealistic funder demands.  The first few weeks felt like pure bliss, a vacation I have not been able to truly enjoy and experience in a decade.  And, in all honesty, 10 months later I still feel a sense of relief and am grateful to have left behind so much of the burden that comes with managing residential programs for homeless youth.  


However, over this past year, as I have transitioned out of a high stress position and environment into a situation with much more time for self-care and reflection, I’ve found myself wondering if I am selling out.  Have I let down my co-workers and the young people I worked so hard to serve for so many years?  I’m not doing the on-the-ground work anymore and I often feel immense guilt about that.  


There is also a loss of kinship that comes with providing social services.  The work is hard, so the co-working relationships are often intense and highly emotionally supportive.  I miss those.  But I also wonder if the common "martyr syndrome" that often plagues those who do this tough work is what makes me feel guilty and like I'm selling out.  A core component of a martyr complex is an exaggerated sense of responsibility to others; namely, putting others' needs in front of your own and seeking validation in that in order to give life meaning or purpose.  Surely, this isn't healthy and won't support a long career in the field.  


​So what have I concluded in this time of less (different) stress?  I've realized that I can make a difference in so many other ways.  I've realized that I have more time in my schedule now to volunteer for other non-profits I believe in.  I've realized that I have more emotional space in my life to pursue passions, build relationships and work towards the full life I want and deserve!  Certainly all worthy causes.


Share on Facebook
Share on Twitter
Please reload

Follow Us

I'm busy working on my blog posts. Watch this space!

Please reload

Search By Tags
Please reload

  • Facebook Basic Square
  • Twitter Basic Square
  • Google+ Basic Square

© 2017 by Allegra Consulting. Proudly created with